Timings on your wedding day
“If time travel is possible, where are the tourists from the future?”
Stephen Hawking, A Brief History of Time.
Guys. I’d like to talk to you about time.
That Stephen Hawking quote on time travel actually bears no relevance to this blog post but when I thought of time, I thought of that.
Anyone who has ever got married will tell you, your wedding day goes by in a flash. In a flash! Why is this?
I invite you to imagine a utopian future, a setting where all the people you choose to spend time with (friends, family, loved ones) are all in one place, at one time. And even better, they’re only there to see you. Well, this utopian scenario I’m describing is in fact your wedding day.
It’s totally understandable that throughout the day, your 60-100 guests all want to see you, talk to you, take photographs of you, as they celebrate your love for your partner in an official capacity. This constant shower happens in between getting ready, getting to the ceremony, doing the ceremony, having your photographs taken, sitting down for dinner, having some speeches, cutting a cake, having a slow dance, then finally the bit you’ve been waiting all day for – having a proper party to round off the night!
For many, this is something you’ve never experienced before, so to combat how best to approach things you’re going on the advice of others to understand how your wedding day, and its timings, should unfold. You’ve probably read blogs and articles, you’ve had advice from family and friends, and probably your wedding suppliers have also advised you too on how your day should shape up. Also, your venue or caterers are probably giving you their two pennies’ worth about it too.
So, as the person that will be there every step of the way on your day, I’d like to take this opportunity to talk about time, and how best to use it in my experience.
On your wedding day, I place the utmost importance on you and your partner having enough time to spend with all your guests with as little obstruction as possible. My job is not to dictate to you on your wedding day, standing in your eyeline tapping my watch and pointing at my camera. My job is to capture your day the way you want it.
But this does require providing enough time to do everything.
Below is a typical timeline from some weddings I’ve experienced:
11.00am Bride getting ready with bridesmaids
2.00pm Travel to ceremony
2.30pm Ceremony commences
3.00pm Ceremony ends
4.30pm Sit down for wedding breakfast
6.00pm Speeches
7.30pm Evening guests arrive
8.00pm Cutting the cake
8.30pm First dance.
Looks straightforward right? This is a typical timeline where you have no other surprises or things planned in amongst it. This does not include any gimmicks or extras your partner or wedding party have planned, like doves being released and all that jazz. This is with a small number of formal group shots that your parents have told you they want.
This is a tight timescale. This also does not leave any time for photographs without you feeling rushed and hurried about – and I’ll show you why:
11.00am – bride getting ready. This is fine. But whatever time you aim to be ready, aim for 30 minutes earlier. When it comes to the crunch, it is a mad dash to be ready, no matter what time you start. Here I’d like to get photographs of the bride in her dress, fresh hair and make up, looking sensational, before we depart for the ceremony / see the registrar / etc. Also this gives time for ‘first look’ photos with whomever you may be travelling with to the ceremony, who may be giving you away for example. This is the only time you’ll be on your own so I can capture you in isolation on your wedding day.
2.00pm – 3.00pm Ceremony time
3.00pm – This is where your ceremony ends, and your guests want to see you. You’ll want to chat to them, you’ll want to have a drink with them, now the ceremony is out of the way and your nerves have subsided. You’ll also potentially want to perhaps enjoy the saxophonist you especially wanted to hear, or see some tricks from the magician you’d been looking forward to seeing entertaining your guests, as well as nibble some of the canapés you agonised over at your tasting session. This is also where I’d expect to capture candid shots of you and your guests whilst in the background.
But guess what? If you’ve asked for formal group shots, then this is the time to do them. Each group shot takes 5 minutes. If you’ve asked for 10 group shots, this is 50 minutes out of the schedule. That’s nearly an hour, just on stiff old formal group shots – not the natural ones you’ve specifically booked me for.
So if I start your group shots only 5 minutes after your ceremony has ended, whisking you away from talking to everyone, this part of photography will take you straight up to 3.50pm.
After group shots I usually try and give my couples a breather to re-adjust their aching smiley faces, grab a drink, and go back to their guests. But we also need to factor in time for your couple shots – those shots of just you and your new husband/wife in and around your venue, the really beautiful shots. This typically should take around 45 minutes so I’m not rushing you and it’s a pleasant experience.
But if you’ve finished group shots at 3.50pm, and couple shots takes 45 minutes, that’s already taking us to 4.35pm, and you’re meant to be sitting down to dinner at 4.30pm. And actually your wedding coordinator wants your guests ushered in for din din at 4.15 because the chef wants to time the starters for exactly 4.30pm, so now we only have to 4.15pm.
So my time to get the shots you hired me to get, is now cut short. Even if I cut it to 25 minutes, which really isn’t enough time, so you’re ready for 4.15pm, there would be no break between the ceremony starting (2.30pm) to finishing, then group shots through to couple shots, through to sitting down to dinner (4.30pm). During that time, you haven’t been able to see any of your guests, because your photographer is rushing you around trying to fit in with the timings, and everyone’s feeling frazzled.
This is not how I want you to enjoy your day.
I want you to spend time with your guests, mingle with them, have a drink, relax, really enjoy yourself – after all, you’ve paid enough money and spent enough time planning and organising this day, and it should be a relaxed celebration.
You may have decided you’re not fussed if there’s less time for photographs. You may be thinking that I don’t need time to do things. I really hope that isn’t the case.
As if you’ve booked me for your wedding day, and love the style of my photographs, I need to tell you, that I need enough time to capture your day, with the type of shots you fell in love when you first looked into wedding photography. We also need that time because when you’re a bride, everything takes a little longer, when you’ve got a big white dress to lug around and everyone – quite understandably – wants to stop and chat to you.
Trust me, I’ve been there and done it.
Furthermore, if the weather isn’t behaving, you don’t know when you’ll need to take our chances to capture the photos. When there’s no contingency for time, and everything’s cutting it a bit fine, there’s not much we can do.
So folks, when you’re planning your wedding day, put more time into your timeline than you think you need. Over-estimate rather than underestimate. Your venue might tell you ‘you must sit down at <certain time>’ – you don’t. You can eat whenever you want. It’s your wedding day, you don’t have to conform to a venue’s timings, just because they want your guests to get to the bar quicker.
Give yourself enough time between everything, so you don’t feel rushed and you have time to relax.
Make sure you have at least two hours in between your ceremony ending and when your guests need to sit down for the wedding breakfast. Two and a half hours is perfect. This seems long – it isn’t. Some drinks and canapés, maybe even some lawn games, will make that seem like two seconds.
OK, so why am I telling you all this?
I want to give you the best experience as a photographer. I also have experienced being a bride. And you being rushed on your wedding day is not how anyone wants you to feel, so by ensuring there is plenty of time will enable you to have the best day, and me to feel I have adequate time to do the job you’re paying me for.
Thanks for reading, as always.
“Remember to look up at the stars and not down at your feet. Never give up work. Work gives you meaning and purpose and life is empty without it. If you are lucky enough to find love, remember it is there and don’t throw it away.”
Stephen Hawking
